Sometimes It's The Little or Small Things

If you ever find yourself moving halfway around the world under the pretense that most of the people there will speak English, keep one thing in mind. There are many different interpretations of the English language.

After about six hundred trips to Subway, which resulted in sandwiches containing lots of everything I asked for (and sometimes things I didn't want), I had a major break through.

The catalyst was a conversation we had in the car with our driver for the day. He was telling us he'd had a good time a couple of days earlier with a group of friends. "Yes, we had a good time." he said. "We had some drinks and made small jokes and told small stories."

I didn't think much of it, because that's how he always talks. It wasn't until a few hours later, when we were standing in line at Subway, that I had a moment of clarity. Up to that point, I'd been trying (in vain) to get the Subway guy to understand my English. "Can I get a little bit of this and a little of that?" And every time I would watch the guy make three passes with the mayo shooter.

This time, I thought I would try to use his English. With the most serious and strait face I could make, I placed my order. "Can I get a foot long turkey on wheat with small lettuce, small tomatoes, small pickles and small mayo, please?" What happened next changed my life.

The Subway guy opens the bread and places the turkey and cheese on it. Then, with the precision of a heart surgeon, he places a small amount of lettuce on top. Next, it was six small tomato slices and 8 pickle slices. I turn to Hillary with a look of awe and delight. I struggled to suppress my smile. He reaches for the mayo and pauses to choose his line. In a deliberate and focused stroke, he applies one thin strip of mayo. Perfection!! Just the way I wanted.

As much as I hate to say it, sometimes you have to be willing to bend to get what you want. From that day on, we've used the word small when ordering from Subway. When in Rome...

Be good,

-TJS